Drama, drama and then ...more drama?

So here I am, back in world. There were various reasons for my being gone, but suffice it to say that I am happy to have returned! I sometimes forget about the drama in sl and what drama it is!

That being said, I just want to say this as well. If I go to a sim, paid for, supported by, built by, and maintained by someone, I do so at his/her whim. Not because I have a divine right to be there.

If I have in some way displeased or upset the person that owns that sim, then why in the world would I wish to stay? I just do not understand, perhaps someone would enlighten me?

I, for one, would not wish to stay where I am not wanted. Now I realize that that is unlikely to happen, but no matter how remote the possibility, no matter how charming and delightful I might think that I am. It is possible.

Tantrums, performed by vindictive, petty people... no matter how justified they feel that they are, are still that, the screaming demonstrations of frustration, hurt, and pain of an emotionally immature individual.

My advice? Grow up, leave, and move on with your life.
You will have much more fun that way and so will everyone else!

Missing you...

It has been a very busy time in my real life, and what I have found bizarre is the number of dreams that have invaded my sleep from my second life...as well as the nature of those dreams. I have not had the chance to be here, consciously, so something took me to sl in my dreams.

  I have not met a person here on sl that does not say rl comes first.  Does this negate the need that we have for the interactions that we have here on sl? I think not.  Nor does it keep us from missing the people that are here.

While away, I sent an e-mail to the only person that I thought would miss me here.  When I did not hear back, after a couple of e-mails, I stopped sending them.  Perhaps, we invest too much emotionally in our sl relationships.  But there it is.

Who's a needy fairy?

I am the person that I am, I have a very busy rl at times.  Other times I have more time to get on-line.  Exploring on sl is what I try to do with much of that time.  At the time I started this venture I did not expect relationships that would garner so much of my attention. Being independant is important to me. But it seems to come at a price. Right now, though I struggle with that, it is well worth it.

Respect is the best foundation for all relationships whether or not they are D/s. We love who we love in all worlds. If they love us back or how they love us back is their own business. I respect those I love, and i realize and accept that we all relate differently. My only hope is that those I love will allow the same for me.

Gorean Grid Wide Hunt!

I spent some time last night following the Gorean hunt. Had stumbled upon it while shopping and decided to start at the beginning and follow the path where it led me. OK, once again I am astounded by the creativity of the people on sl!



I am only about a third of the way through, and I was lucky enough to hook up with a couple of other hunters... the more eyes the better, I always say! My favorite, so far has been a place that makes musical instruments! If you have the time, join in the fun!Hope I see you there!

On a side note:
Actually, I had started this hunt after running through the lag(insert a chuckle about the word running, here) at Twisted and Spoiled, for their hunt. Such cute things in that store! However the patrons had to strip themselved of any HUDs, prim objects (including some hair), and even tossed AOs so that they could actually move. What we women will do for a bargain! (I flatly refuse to lose the AO, myself)

These are my very first hunts, and I had fun! Have not opened any boxes yet, so not sure if it is worth the effort, but I did get to see some stores and some merchandise I did not know existed, so I think that the point is made. Try it sometime!

Both Sides of the Looking Glass

By chance, I was lucky enough to attend a talk lead by Havelock Raymaker, a RL Dominant and tutor for the organizers, the D/s Academy. The discussion was held partially in voice and partially in text, at first I had a few glitches, but after that was worked out I have to say that I was impressed by the speaker and the others attending. The topic? Is there such a thing as abuse in SL and if so what forms do you think it takes ?

The discussion reminded me of so many that I have been to in rl. I found the participants thoughtful, and reasonable. The original topic soon turned toward the responsibility of both parties in a D/s relationship. The care that is taken to keep the trust of the submissive from becoming abusive. The key being communication.

The talk was over far too soon! I am happy to have stumbled upon the meeting and hope to attend more in the future!

Mirror images

Wow, I have had more than a few comments, in IM, about my last post when I last logged on. Let me be clear, about something. I am not denigrating sl Master/slave relationships. There is a clear bond between this sort of meeting of the minds. However, if you are someone that is acting out submission without ever having knelt at someone's feet. how do you know how that truly feels? You and I sit here, behind the safety of a screen.For example, I was told once of a wedding on sl where the bride interrupted the ceremony with something like ((brb, my Ramen noodles are ready)) You tell me, how committed was she?

When I am here, rping that I am being tied to a post,spoken to in a certain manner, and then I am spanked, used or whatever...I have a very real visceral memory/connection to the real life experience and my response to the scene is multiplied exponentially. I understand, without doubt, what it takes to place myself in the hands of someone who has me helpless, and in his/her thrall.

I also know what it is like to live the experience 24/7. There are dimensions that I never could have imagined, had I not lived through them in rl. There are many tests to this sort of relationship, since it is not accepted conventionally, it remains under wraps. I have been called an anticipatory slave. "Thoughtful" is the vanilla word for it, I think. Vanilla friends have expressed concern at my "submissive" attitude. Please know that the most important word in a D/s relationship, is relationship. Maybe this is why I do not seek or wear a collar. I dearly love the people that I interact here, but I wonder if I am able to wear two collars? I know that people have a marriage in the real world and one here on sl, but is that me? For now I am content the way things are.

So if you are strictly in an sl relationship, please do not feel defensive or think that I mean that you are less committed. What I am saying is this... There are dimensions to your psyche that you cannot explore from behind a desk. For me, it was so much better to push off from the dock and set sail on an ocean of discovery , exploring in ways I had only imagined until then. That was the right course for me, it is up to you to choose the path for you.

BTW, from the day I met my Master, I have not played in rl with anyone other than him.

This Side of the Looking Glass

Every time I read something that is said by anyone on sl that they like this or that...some small part of me wonders if they have any rl experience with this particular activity. It is not always about D/s. There are a lot of other things as well.

So about me in rl:
I like Art museums, History Museums, Traveling, Chocolate Martinis, Dancing, Soft Jazz, Hard Rock, Massages, Manicures, Entire weekends of lovemaking, Eating popcorn in bed.

I do not like people that are mean-spirited, bullies or anyone who does not find it somewhere within themselves to find the tiniest amount of compassion.
Yes, in rl or even here, on sl.

In rl D/s:
I love long, long sessions that build 'till I am so deeply in subspace I do not know up from down, in from out, back from front...but ohhh my, I feel so safe and warm, and cared for that...only one thing exists for me there...nothing else can penetrate.

I have played both sides of the coin in rl, when I was learning where my heart truly resides. I still hear from the male submissives that I knew from that short period of my life. Sometimes, while on sl, I still explore my more dom side. But life, even an sl life, is too short to be something that you are not.

So that is me, I live what I talk about here. I know the pitfalls, and the peaks of ecstasy

Maybe I do not wear pixel wings here in rl, but I have been known to fly!